What do your boobs say, anyway?

O: You are the tickle monster. It's like my Sesame Street nightmares.
C: You had nightmares from Sesame Street?
O: Yes.
C: Why?
O: Big Bird!
C: What's scary about Bid Bird?
O: Wait, was Big Bird a boy or a girl? Wasn't he like a transvestite? It's a serious question!
C: "Is Big Bird a transvestite?" is a serious question.

O: There's like this fanfic about Barney, except it was really odd..
C: There was a fanfic about Barney??
O: Except it was like a psycho killer and he went around killing people....they impregnated a bunch of kids, like just beginning puberty...

A2: I think you would be a good dog owner. It's a shame to waste your talent on cats.
C: We had a dog once. It was nice, though - I didn't have to pick up poop. Maybe someday.
A1: You wipe your own ass. It's not any worse than that.

O: Pikachu's hot....no, no the woman who does Pikachu's voice is a highly attractive woman.

AB: I'm supposed to grab MW's hair. I think CC's supposed to grab mine.
CC; What?
AB: Did you look down? I'm tightening my belt.

CC: I am ticklish; you just can't do it here.
AB: Thank you C***. That was very forward.

AB: Pants off by the third date, or she's not that into you.
CC: What if they're like me and don't wear pants?
AB: Then you're doing good.

AB: Man, I want a niece or nephew to spoil rotten. I wish my brother would fool around more.

O: Why would you do that? It's so far away now. It's like the Bermuda Triangle.

O: A lot of people think I'm a slob. I'm like, whatever. You're not a textbook or a cup of coffee. What I'm really saying is 'I don't know how to talk to you if you're none of these things.'

AB: Why are you playing with my chest?
CC: Because I don't know where your nipple is. Where the hell are nipples on guys? Oh. There.
AB: Where the hell else would they be?

U: I'd like another slice of watermelon.
MW: You have to make out with me first.
CC: Oooh, can I join?
U: That's a tough call, 'cause I really love watermelon.

O: I'm not able to kill myself successfully in dreams because of C***!

O: I love my professor like I would love a puppy dog. An intelligent one that lectures to me in a puppy dog sort of way.
H: I see. Does he have floppy ears?

PW: How does she deliver without muscle contractions?
C: How do vampires get erections without bloodflow? There are so many questions...
MP: Where's your notebook?
C: O*** says it's nitrous oxide...

PW: There's an antidepressant that gives 20% of its users an orgasm.
MP: Really?
PW: And the other users get nothing.
J: So it's either an orgasm or it's nothing. Damn, sounds like a man.

U: I was so distracted in class. We were talking about circumference and he was like 'look at this Dasani bottle. Look at the curves. It is like the curves of a woman....'

H: Thank you for getting the Soup Song stuck in my head.
C: It was his fault....he said coriander.

E: She's a model. I saw the pictures and I was so turned on. If I were a lesbian woman I would so go after O****.

R: It's like the pilsbury doughboy, but Japanese.
C * poke*
O: Nyah!

AB: That wouldn't be the only party when I ended up wrestling people.
E: Yeah, you're always touching people....you're the touchy-feely
H: I think this conversation is going bad.
AB: I like goats?
SG: There's a goat tied up across the street for afterwards..
E: The whole goats thing is, I dunnno.
AB: Yeah, the horns...

AB: It makes you urinate your bones.
E: Well, that's a way of saying it.
AB: 'Mom, I've just passed a femur.'

AB: Last time I got in the book it was for being gay....you better be careful Uyen, the next time you bring an impressionable young man.

AB: Oh, O*** and the other guys , they're all like 'yeah, those are nice boobs. Oh yeah.' I've even had my nipples pinched. There's a picture of me in front of Sugar Mountain and he's like (sound effects).

SG: But the bigger the boobs, the bigger the sag.
O: What do your boobs say, anyway?

E: That was the first time I learnt that guys have hair down there too. And I said it out loud in class...
MW: Well, the statues don't.

E: Well, no one here is gay.
*AB raises hand*
AB: Don't worry.
MW: He'll take it slow.
AB: And then I'll speed it right up.
SG: That's creepy.
E: Don't do the eyebrows.

E: We are the only animals that do stuff like that. You don't see a lion eating some meat and then you see it squirt blood out of its eyeball.
R: That would be awesome.

C: Couldn't you look at pictures? Then they're less moronic.
AB: Then you don't have to hear them talk.
E: I like my people in action.

E: But all the Hooter's girls are like busty, blonde...
O: That's just in America.
E: So Canada has multicultural Hooter's?

E: Why would they do a Playboy version of Hamlet?
AB: It was better than a lot of the others.

H: Did you notice O***?
C: Yes.
H: I just love the dichotomy of your conversation and O*** singing 'I'm a little teapot' behind.
R: And this talk of vampire penises....

AB: It's like 'can you dance? are you anorexic?'
C: Wash a car for us.
AB: Wash the producer's car.
MP: Wash the car and eat a hot dog.

MP: Family Guy has done a lot to destroy my childhood memories.

(on McCain and Obama)
AB: So why didn't they sleep?
MP: The election campaign.
MW: Oooh, getting juicy.

MP: He has really long fingers and likes touching rust.
E: Who?
MP: Salad Fingers. He travels the world in search of the perfect spoon.
AB: What?

AB: Don't take me seriously.
C: No one ever does; don't worry.
AB: I can get away with what I want, though. I could tell every woman in a room they're the most beautiful.
E: And no one in the world would believe you.

AB: And what weight are you losing?
SG: You lose any more weight and you'll disappear.
E: No, I got some squashy jiggly bits.

AB: But you know what was funny? Before you guys started dating it was British, but then it went down South.

AB: I got half a buttcheek and two women's weight on me. I hope this is a short movie.

AB: I'm just covered in women's legs.
O: Were you molested?
AB: I'm a lesser man than I used to be.

O: Captain Kittens is almost normal.
C: No he isn't.
H: That's an awesome name.
O: The best part is that he likes it.

H: You are so red. Why don't you go balance a ball on your nose.
C: That wasn't a real suggestion.