February 1, 2007: Stop writing things down! Stop it! Stop it now!

(from before, inspired by Grey's Anatomy:
-Ewww!
=What?
-No, 'ewe!' There's a sheep!)
~

Hockey commentators:

-The hairy eyeball: Is that the precursor to the evil eye?
=No, the evil eye comes first. The evil eye is lame now, Dean.

-Andre Meszaros had him in his sights. That's a bit like being Henry VIII, except that involved a guillotine. Coles notes version there...

=Big call there...think you missed that one.
-I was being minimalist.

-Chara's stick is about as thick as a sequoia tree and about as long as a mature one.
=A mere mortal like you and I couldn't bend it, that's what that means.

-Is the sand ever going to slip out of the hourglass of Nick Lidstrom?

-Malkin already up at centre, "Feed me; I'm hot!"

Buffalonians
~

HW being articulate:
-I like 87 because it's my year and that makes me cool feel. feel. feel cool.
-Count no count no. no count. It doesn't count.
-And then I understood made.
-We need to camerami cameramize, camera-ize this.
-Four against four of fourness. That's bad.
-(C: Rabidly or rapidly?)
Openly rabidly. Hopefully rapedly. Hopefully rapidly.

C: That's what I was saying! Only I made it sound inappropriate!

C: You're being haunted by the ghosts of Aerosmith! Are they dead?
AS: No.
C: Ok, it's astral projection, then.

AS: I want Havlat to score.
HW: I want Havlat to score more than you want Havlat to score.
C: It's not a competition.
HW: Yes, it is. He's mine. Don't touch him. Or else.

C: The pen is mightier than the sword!
AS: Especially if it pokes you in the eye.
C: Actually, I think that a sword poking you in the eye would hurt quite a bit.
AS: Yes, but so would a pen. I mean a sword could go right through your head, but a pen would hurt quite a bit.

HW: Oh, did you hear that? Holy crap!
AS: What?
HW: I said "crap"!

HW: That's awesome! I'm going to scream "star!" when it comes on now.
C: But you're not from Dallas.
HW: So, I'll scream it at the wrong time. 'Oooh say STAR!'

AS: I couldn't do that.
C: No, you'd fall over.
AA: I would.
C: And then I'd laugh.
AS: You would. That's exactly what would happen.

HW as cameraperson would follow Havlat around, even when he was sitting on the bench and the play was going on.
HW: They (the Americans) would probably like it better; it would be like a drama. Who's going to yell at whom next on the bench?

A(?): Ok, they're rubbing that thing (the Stanley Cup) innappropriately.

looking at photos:
HW: Guess what that is?
C: Your BRAIN!
HW: The inside of my mouth. Guess what that is?
C: Your BRAIN!
HW: The inside of my eye. Guess what that is?
C: Your BRAIN!
HW: My ear...we're so mature.

AS: How the hell do you know that (SC's television schedule)?
HW: Because I learned it today in math class.
C: And that makes you feel special why?
HW: Because I'm taking math...

-And from the Washington Capitals, Mike Green
AS: Because he's GREEN! (laughs to self).

AS: I was trying to be like Rimmer. In hindsight I was trying to be like Rimmer.

HW: Ok, Lehtonen is like heaven in a bottle.

AS: I'm in denial, remember; you can't bring it up! Stop writing things down! Stop it! Stop it now!

C: Aaah, I am a one-toothed vampire!

C: Where have YOU been?
HW: In, like, Rome?
AS: That would be awesome!

C: We have two vampires and someone who likes carrots.
AS: Obviously much cooler. At least I'm getting my vitamins.

HW: I have taken some cool pictures. It's like my head is falling off.

AS: Ow. I think I broke my wrist.
HW: I think *I* broke your wrist.

HW: A teenage mutant ninja turtle!
C: He hasn't got a bandana.
HW: Maybe he took it off.
C: A naked teenage mutant ninja turtle? Dude.
HW: Dude. If you only wear a bandana, you're messed up anyway.

AS: You know how tiring it is to be around you two?...just watching hockey all day...the amount of ridiculousness is just draining.

Sid the Kid Sid the Old Sid the Geriatric Sidney the Kidney Sid the Invalid

C: I need to pee again. What is this crap?!
AS: Haha. Crap.
C: (laughs hysterically) I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so literal.
AS: I don't even have the energy to hit you. What is wrong with the world?

HW: Ok, the aliens migrated.
AS: What aliens? The drugs!

AS: Wouldn't that be awesome, my facebook picture a picture of facebook?
C: How very post-modern.
HW: Neo-conservative post-modern.

AS: I'm going to have bruises now. Wet bruises.

C: Dude
HW: Fu*ker
C: Fu*king dude
HW: Dude fu*king fu*cking dude...I'll keep going if *you* want to...
C: Why'd you have to make that sound so dirty?

HW: I'm going to run away. I'm going to go up to the Arctic like Frankenstein's creature.

C: HW's the crazy one. She keeps laughing hysterically for no reason.
HW: There are reasons in my head.
SC: Do the reasons in your head tell you to?

SC: Hairdressers really shouldn't do that. They should refuse to commit that travesty.
C: "I'm sorry, I'm morally opposed to giving you that haircut."
AS: Haircuts should be state-regulated, to avoid the travesty that is a mullet.

SC: I didn't know Ben&Jerry's had chocolates.
HW: I didn't know *you* had chocolates...shut up.

AS: No, we need to distinguish in Australia. "Oh, I like eating Kiwi..."
SC: They're like, "Oh, you find some roadkill again?"

AS: I saw that episode on CSI when someone dies...some die guys, some die guys...

AS: I ate that today. Oh, no I didn't. I'm imagining food.

C: You were sitting on the carrot bag?
AS: Maybe? How would I know? It's plastic.