Love means never having to say you're a graph theorist

HW: The skills! You missed my beautiful singing!
C: Oh dear. I feel a gaping hole in my life.
H: You should.
C: You shouldn't have told me.
H: A gaping hole--like your mouth!

H: I'm going to do that during the movie. Just get up there and start singing.
C: You want to sit over there?
H: He does it in the movie.
C: See, there's a difference: he's allowed, because he's in the movie. You're in the audience.
H: They should have made it have made it a musical. The whole House of Commons bursts into song. The whole slave ship.
C: Because they're such happy places...

H to C: You're so not in the same conversation as us. 'I want to climb mountains!' 'I want to climb trees!'

H: I really like Persuasion. I read it the other day. Here. Right here. I skipped a bunch, though, because I read really quickly when I'm caffeinated.

H: It grows back weird skin, though, like I'm being taken over by aliens.

H: You(C) got into my life plans! I'm going to see you at least once in the next ten years!

H: I keep going through spouts of depression.
C: Spouts?
H: Yeah, that's probably not the right word.
C: No.

H: You could be selling your soul to the devil! You could be like that guy..
C: Faustus?
H: No, not that academic. I was thinking of Wormtail....Harry Potter is almost Faustus...

H: Now I've noticed that girls are bastards and guys are bitches when I get angry at the television. Stupid A...

C: I hate my life.
H: Yeah, I hate your life too.
C: Thanks.
H: You're welcome.

TNV: So first it's a crime lord, a mathematical crime lord, now he has a teddy bear....white collar crime lord...
C: Talk about picky...

T: If the words most preserved in language are the sexual profanities then if you met a person from Chaucerian England, then one communication you could definately achieve would be to insult their mother.

'you had me at 'universal syntax.''
'love means never having to say you're a graph theorist.' T: I pondered that one in my deep moments.

T: One of my rabbits kicked me and I thought of you(C).

T: I have good news and I have bad news. The bad news is we're knocking our school down. With a bulldozer...I can't remember the good news....

C: Nineteen's awfully young. I'd like to be a kid for a while longer.
T: I like being an undergrad. And I haven't met my mathematician crimelord yet. Carrying a teddy bear. And a fedora hat and cracking a joke...I think the teddy bear will be the hardest to find, though...

C: Should be ok, though. I'm not that difficult to live with. And not that easily offended. Usually.
T: So long as they don't slaughter bunnies in their front yard.
C: Yeah. Back yard's ok...I love how that's the first thing you think of.
T: Actually, it's a line from a Russian literature classic...

C: All it is is 'my girlfriend is dead. This is clearly an excuse to slaughter a whole bunch of people.'
T: 'I've always wanted to slaughter a whole bunch of people. This is the perfect opportunity!'

T: I tried out writing erotica, but my people just ended up talking instead of having sex, just like real life....Honestly, l've written 33 pages so far. The sex took one paragraph. You're going to put that in your profile, aren't you?
C: YES.
T: Put that next to R's pornography quote...oh yeah, and three lines describing rape. I intentionally put that part short because I don't want people jacking off to my writing. They can jack off to the consensual part alright....oh yeah, the three lines are not consecutive.
C: Thanks for all the details.
T: Hey, I may ask you to edit it for me someday.
...
T: And they're arguing...
C: Oh, so that's why they talk so long.
T: And then she tells him if he keeps on biting on his fork like that he's going to break his teeth.
C: Why does he have a FORK?!?!?!
T: They're having breakfast. Afterwards.....I can see several ways in which I can involve a fork if I need to, but none of them are vital to the plot at the moment...you're going to choke...challenge: write a sex scene in which a fork is the major plot point. "There is no spoon." Did you write down 'there is no spoon'?
C: Yes, and you will see it on Facebook very shortly.
T: I think I will get a lot more friend requests.

T: Yay bra yay...I needed it.
C: Do you really need to walk down the street chanting 'yay bra yay'?
T: Why not?
C: Why?
T: I'm making up for when we were terribly repressed in grade seven! Yay bra yay! All of facebook is going to know!

T: Burn the bonfire burn the bonfire put the teachers on the top...
C: Hostility there...
T: Free association. There was a rhyme scheme.
JL: That didn't rhyme.
T: Burn the bonfire burn the bonfire put the teachers on the top, put the headmaster in the middle and burn the whole lot...

T: ..My mum's crazy.
C: So you come by your insanity honestly, then.
T: Yes. I didn't steal it or do revolting things to get it. With a fork. I know what you were thinking.

C: Cake in bed is a bit messy.
T: There's that whole whipped cream thing.
C: Yes, but you don't usually eat it with a fork.
T: I did. In Starbucks.
C: But off a person? You might poke something.
T: For some people that might be the most exciting part.
J: Ummmmmmm ok.
T: Actually, some people make bracelets out of forks.
J: Like, bend it?
(bracelet conversation)

J: Actually, I do sometimes write down what people say, if it is especially strange.
T: Me too.
C: It is a major occupation of my life.

T: ...You can also hang things on a fork. You can also comb people's hair with a fork. Because it's kind of a very short comb.
J: It's called a dingle-hopper.
T: Thank you.
J: There's a slight difference...you don't notice it when you look at it. The difference is in the usage.
T: So if you use a fork as a dingle-hopper, it would be a dingle-hopper, so the difference is merely academic!

T..oh yeah, and you can use them to play music, because they resonate and have a pure tone. "If music be the food of love, play on!" Gee, grade eleven physics, who'da thunk?